Be Better with Auctoritas



New at Mountebanks!

Our new range of Auctoritas teas will energize and refresh you, making you a productive and profitable member of society.

Pick up a box in store today, and remember,

If you don't produce, you're of no use!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Obsequious Boot Polish - New at Mountebanks

Image
Introducing Obsequious Boot Polish An all natural, solvent free* boot polish, designed to create the highest quality shine, no matter whose boots you** need to lick! Only at Mountebanks! *Ingredients are neither natural or solvent-free.  **May only be applied by proletarians, not suitable for use by bourgeoisie
Read more

Difficulty Leaving the House? Mountebanks Can Help!

Keep calm, and carry on consuming, with Pandemavert!  Our new Pandemavert range is made with businesses in mind, and will keep the economy safe from the self-preservation instinct keeping you at home. Just place a drop under your tongue, and within seconds you'll be relaxed and ready to go! Never worry about leaving your home again, with Pandemavert, only at Mountebanks!
Read more

Struggling for Cash? Subsidise Your Earnings with Mountebanks Home Store Sales Scheme!

Image
Times are hard right now, and we know it, which is why we've developed our new Home Store Sales Scheme! Sign up today, and put in hours of work for free, whilst shilling our low exchange-value, vastly overpriced products to your friends and family online, earning a meagre commission in return! Just complete our attached leaflet, send off, and within days you could be generating profit and value for a company that would happily see you starve.  It's not manipulation, it's Multi-Level Marketing!
Read more